Thursday, September 17, 2009

Strangely alone . . .

So I am in the middle of searching for a new apartment. I found out a few weeks ago that Brittany is moving out, which means I am moving down to a one bedroom. The really strange thing is, that in searching for something as simple as a new apartment, I am beginning to plan out the next year or so of my life. Which is up with the clouds. . .

I really feel that my time here is done. My friends are going different directions, the heat is starting to make me crankier than ever, when I reach my goals for the year, I feel that the school will no longer need me. The reason I am here this year is to move my kids out of ELD. End of story. No discussion. I will work with all my heart to achieve this, but them my time is over. In addition to all this, I miss my family and friends back home more than imaginable. I have never even held my new niece, and won't see her until she's over 3 months old. I am truly struggling to keep going, it's merely the thought of seeing my kids every day that makes it worth getting out of bed. Ironic how my first year, my kids were the ones making me want to stay IN bed! My how things change.

2 months in, 8 months to go.

Wednesday, June 3, 2009

Summer Reading List


I have, unfortunately, come to the conclusion that the majority of my reading must be completed in the month that I go home during the summer. The regular year is filled with lesson planning, committees, grad school and after-school tutoring. Who has time to read for pleasure? Not this over-committed teacher. With this conlusion in mind, these are the books I have decided on for my summer expansion (by the way, I am ALWAYS open to more suggestions!).



The Other Boelyn Girl
God's Middle Finger
The Diary of Anne Frank
Wicked
The Memory Keeper's Daughter
Dharma Bums
Clockwork Orange
Animal Farm
Watership Down
The Green Mile
Mother Tongue
My Sister's Keeper
The Lighthouse
Jane Eyre (again . . . if time!)

I feel that this is a relatively well-put-together mix of "popcorn" literature and classics. I have been recommended a few novels which I consider "chick" lit, and I must admit it is not my favorite type of genre. However, I am willing to put aside my biases and give them a try. I have already started on Dharma Bums and The Other Boelyn Girl, and I'm excited to spend some time this summer lying on Grand Traverse Bay beach with nothing to do but read. Does life really get any better than that??

Wednesday, May 27, 2009

Good-bye Danny. You will be missed.

The day before the final day of school, in other words, 8th grade promotion. My day started a bit sentimental, as I stood watching my first year class coming into school looking like they are 18 or 19, as opposed to 14. Ties, jackets, high heels, dresses, "evening" hair, the works. Initially, I was excited for them to go (honestly, what teacher isn't excited to get rid of the 8th graders the last week of school), but I was assaulted with a feeling of nostalgia as I watched them parade by. Then, my phone rings.

It is a text from a good friend of mine back home, informing me that my jazz professor/piano teacher has died. Mind you, I only found out last night that he had been diagnosed with leukemia and had received an infection after many rounds of chemo. His blood pressure had fallen so low that he was not expected to make it through the night. He made it through the night, but that was all the strength left in him. At 8AM on May 27th, Danny Jordan went home.

My heart is so heavy, as I think back over my music education and realize just how much time I spent with this man and how very much I respected him. All told, I probably took 8 or 9 classes with him, and he was the one that taught me how to sing jazz. I would never have had the courage to attempt such a feat, if it had not been for Danny Jordan. Because of him I spent hours upon hours listening to Ella Fitzgerald, memorizing her songs, repeatedly attempting her solos. Because of him I learned to scat, I learned to get over my fears, I learned to play jazz on the piano (minimal as it may be).

He was an incredible pianist, probably one of the best I've ever heard, and he had perfect pitch like no one I've ever known! He loved to listen to Oscar Peterson and play him in class for examples. He would play Oscar over and over and over, pointing out different chord structure and sounds, then mimicing them on the piano. Danny taught me more music than anyone person had before, or has since. He made me into the musician and person I am today. I just pray that he knew how much he mattered and how much he made a difference in all of our lives.

The world has lost a musician and a teacher, and I have lost a mentor and a role model. Our lives will not be the same without you Danny. May you peacefully rest, for all eternity.

Monday, May 25, 2009

&nb
This weekend, instead of staying around to suffer through the scorching heat of Phoenix, we took a little journey northwest to Kingman. One of our good friends, Signpost, teaches there and we often make excursions to escape our concrete jungle. Now, if you have never been to Kingman, it IS on the way to Vegas and the Hoover Dam, but that is about it's only redeeming factor. It is a relatively small city that sprung up around the mining industry and Route 66, however, once the mining industry took a nosedive, so did Kingman. It's a nice break from the big city, but I must admit, I am not sure how Jon has survived out there for two years, alone. I would claw my eyes out from boredom. I digress.

We drove out Saturday afternoon and went straight to the campground via a 12 mile road, which slowly crawls up the side of a 6000 foot mountain. The actual campground was secluded, and sat directly atop of one of the mountain peaks with stunning views on all sides. It was quite windy, thus the name "Windy Point Campground," and my new tent got a work out! However, my good ole' Sierra Design performed beautifully :-)

We also had a chance to climb a hill on the far side of our campsite, which contained these enormous mounds of boulders on the top of the hill. Eric climbed almost the entire way to the top, while I came close behind. I am definitely not quite agile enough to make it as far as he did, but with practice I'll be able to keep up. He's going to see if there are any places around here where we can do a little bouldering. I absolutely loved it. The views were incomparable, and it actually took a lot of strength and gave a pretty good work out :-)
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I must admit. . . I look pretty bad ass sitting pretty on top of this mound of boulders! While we were camping, we hiked up this little peak that was covered with boulders and I had my first true experience with "bouldering." It was really incredible and definitely something that I would like to pursue further. What a rush.
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Tuesday, May 19, 2009

Who knew?

Who knew that one could actually report sibling abuse (between a 14 and a 13 year old) to Child Protective Services?

Who knew that a mom could marry her child's grandfather?

Who knew that a couple in their 70's could take on four children, when no one else wants them, who are of absolutely no blood-relation, and raise them as their own?

Who knew that a woman, after receiving a diagnosis of severe osteoperosis and having a hip replacement, could offer the last miniscule of money that she had in the world, to help her adopted chlid go to Washington DC, just so she has a chance to do something with her life?

Who knew that a child could be born into this world, and within three days of her life beginning, have to receive open brain surgery to remove a cyst?

Who knew that these children could change the lives of so many?

Days like today leave me confused, frustrated and angry . . .yet hope. There is always that tiniest glimmer of hope that there IS good in the world and it IS worth searching for.

Saturday, May 16, 2009

A whole new level...

I've started "training" this week for my trip to the Grand Canyon. Well, honestly, I'm not sure you can exactly call it training, more like walking with my pack on. I must admit though, a 20 - 25 lb pack on your back takes hiking to a whole new level, one that I admit I was not quite ready for.

I've been starting simple: 3 mile walks in the morning, 3 mile hikes at Thunderbird park on the weekends. The things that I am not enjoying, however, is this bloody heat. I am kicking myself for not starting this two months ago when it was actually enjoyable outside. Last weekend it was 93 degrees at 9:30 in the morning. This has apparently been one of the hottest May's on record. Great timing, Forster. Wait until the hottest month so far, to put a full 25 lb pack on and tromp around in the desert. Genius.

Despite my complaints, I think I'm finally starting to get the hang of this. How do I hike a 1000 foot incline with this thing attached to me? How do I talk myself into actually continuing, instead of curling up under the first Verde tree I see? How do I keep the sweat that is pouring down my face from blinding me, because my head is looking at the ground, not at the massive hill I have to climb? How do I keep from panicking at the sight of this monstrosity that I must conquer? These are all questions I am finally able to answer, after five months of these hiking feats. I am the first one to admit I have an entire desert to cross before I am physically in the shape I want to be, but I feel that I have made some good strides. Long way to go though. . . very long way.

Tuesday, May 5, 2009

Only three weeks left . . .

I am really amazed at how drastically the kids have changed in the last five days. ONE week ago they were working wonderfully in their groups, getting all their work done in a timely manner, being respectful and kind to one another and just being fabulous little seventh graders in general. Then the temperature skyrocketed. Yes, now we are looking at four consistent days of 100 degree weather, and I truly believe that their brains have been fried. Cooked like little sausages on Sunday morning.

Overnight, I have 28 hellions in my room who refuse to listen, can't keep their grubby little paws to themselve, insist that they know better than any of their teachers, and honestly, truly believe that the rules apply to everyone but themselves. Sigh. My favorite time of year. Monday morning we spent 15 minutes practicing walking in a straight line with another colleague's class. That was a sight to behold. . . 60 seventh graders walking silently, in an impeccably straight line around and around and around and around the basketball courts. They earned it - they refused to line up in the morning when the bell rang.

I forgot one more thing. I have been hearing rumors that students in my homeroom class are a)bringing weed to school and b)smoking in the park before/after school. I am surrounded by geniuses.

Consequently, by Tuesday afternoon I had rearranged my room from warm, comforting, friendly tables to cold, heartless pairs (soon to be followed by evil rows, if they can't keep their behavior under control!). The rearrangement was accompanied by a threat of book work for the next three weeks, if needed. This seems to have pacified their need to push the boundaries as far as humanly possible. . .
We shall see how long it lasts.

Sunday, April 26, 2009

What a "flaming" disappointment...

It is currently 4:23 and I cannot sleep. We went to the Flaming Lips concert tonight, and it was horrible. Probably one of the worst shows I've been to in a while. I need to write a bit about it, but I'm exhausted and can't concentrate (the litter boxes smell and it's distracting me....I am NOT cleaning litter boxes at 4AM, that's where I draw the line). More tomorrow.

Saturday, April 25, 2009

Only 10 feet away....

So, tonight was my first Michael Franti concert.

Okay, let me back up. Michael Franti and Spearhead is honestly one of my favorite bands of all time. He not only has good music (a mixture of funk, reggae, rap and blues), but he has incredible lyrics. This is a major point for me when considering a band (of course it is, I write and am an English teacher). If an artist cannot write poignant, thought-provoking lyrics that discuss not simply their personal lives, but social and political issues as well, it is hard for me to fully support them. Franti does all of these things so amazingly well (up until the album "All Rebel Rockers", but I digress), and was one of the greatest concerts I have ever been to.

The festival was the McDowell Mountain Music Festival out in Scottsdale, and we arrived, not really knowing what to expect. Hot Tuna went on at 7:00, and we plodded in around 7:30. It was incredibly quiet for a festival (well, any festival we had been to), and seemed so very quaint. Hot Tuna finished about 20 minutes before Franti, so we headed up toward the front of the stage. Literatlly, there were probably about 500 people there, and only about 1/3 of them were in front by the stage! We were able to stand 10 feet from the front of the stage, and could have been closer, if it weren't for my strange neurosis about crowd's of people.

The show started and at first, everyone was cool and pretty chilled out. Franti's crowd is typically just a bunch of pot-smoking hippies, which are typically the most easy-going, chilled out people in the world! However, at the very beginning, there was a couple of rich kids from Scottsdale that were coked out or SOMETHING. They were completely out of control and ruining things for everyone. They were dancing and spinning and literally knocking people over as they were doing it! Everyone was frustrated, when the guy (probably about 23) knocked me over for the third or fourth time and I finally looked at him and said, "You guys need to chill out. You're ruining this for everyone!"

"You just need to cool down and have a litte fun, everyone else is having a good time. You're just too high strung," came his response. Oooooh..my blood began to boil.
"Seriously, someone is going to get hurt if you guys don't chill out." To which he started getting up in my face, and I switched right into full-on Forster teacher mode. It was actually frightening how quickly that happened. I squared up to him, and said "You need to back off."
"Oooh, I'm scared. What are you going to do to me?"
"You need to back off." Long pause. "Back off."

Amazingly enough, he did. He cooled off and didn't bother anyone the rest of the night. Eric told me after the show that people were actually really glad that I said something. I was a little nervous while I was doing it, but in all honesty, what is he going to do, hit me? There were at least 5 guys standing behind me that would have taken him out, he would have gotten kicked out of the show, and I would have pressed charges. I almost wish he would have hit me :-) It would have made for an even better show *chuckling*. Boy, I sure can attract em!

All in all, it was an absolutely incredible evening. I don't think I have ever been that close in a show before. No, I am wrong. We were that close at George Clinton and the P-Funk Allstars, sitting behind a gang in black leather with "Satan's Helpers" sewed on their black vests. No kidding. Surprisingly enough, they were the friendliest people at that show, and they definitely had our back if needed! I digress...again. Franti is an amazing performer, and his music is incredible. If you don't have his albums, I would highly suggest "Yell Fire," or "Everyone Deserves Music." I have listened to these two albums more than any other put together. The show definitely did not disappoint.

Thursday, April 23, 2009

Feeling like a mother . . .

Every so often there comes a day when I feel like a motherless child. Kidding, when I feel like the mother of literally 85 children. One of those days when everyone is demanding my attention, when everyone can't live or function without me, where everyone is screaming at me at the same time! While this may seem like a wonderful ego boost, I would beg to differ. It is probably one of the most exhausting experiences I have as a teacher. This barrage of demands usually begins when the weather starts to warm up, when everyone is feeling like it's the end of school and when they simply cannot focus on one single thing for more than 20 seconds at a time. This also becomes the time of year when I feel like I spend more of my time in the hallway having "the talk" then I do actually teaching my class. I suppose it is simply par for the course when teaching 12 and 13 year olds, but it honestly just wears me out.

Thursday, April 2, 2009

One is silver and the other is gold . . .

Do you remember that little song that you learned when you were five? "Make new friends, but keep the old. One is silver and the other is gold." That song keeps going over and over in my head tonight. I had a conversation with a very dear friend tonight, and it just reminded me of how very much I miss my friends. There is something to be said about those who know you the best. I love my new friends, but there is a sense of comfort to be found with those at home, which I have yet to reach in my new home.

I really dont' know what it was about today. Maybe the stress from school, maybe watching Sex and the City, maybe the stress at home . . . maybe just everything combined. I miss having conversations about things other than our kids, or the stupid people at work, or the crazy shit that happened that day. I want to have normal conversations about life, love, happiness, problems, frustrations, hopes and dreams, without having to explain myself because we just don't know each other well enough yet.

Long story short: I desperately miss my friends.

Monday, March 23, 2009

Procrastination

You know, if I would just turn off the t.v. and internet and focus, I could get my homework done and actually go to bed. Or perhaps, I would just finally get all of my work done . . . what a wonder that would be. However, here I sit screwing around on the internet and not grading papers or doing homework. Why do I procrastinate so much? One of these days it's gonig to come back to bite me.

Sunday, March 22, 2009

Home again . . .

I arrived back in AZ last night from my five day vacation to Michigan. Five days is the perfect amount of time to go home . . . enough time to see the kids and spend some time with them, and my folks. Yet, I don't begin to lose my mind half way through my vacation. While I was home dad and I went shopping for gear for our trip in the fall. I am SO excited for this trip! I think I'm going to attempt a few other camping trips before the Grand Canyon, just to make sure I can hack it!

I've been doing quite a bit of thinking the last few weeks about my next stint of time in Arizona. I love my job and my kids, but the more I have been hiking and getting up into the mountains, the more I despise Phoenix. I would absolutely love to live somewhere else in Arizona, outside of this god-forsaken valley. But with the job market as tight as it is, I think I may be stuck here for a bit. I have really begun to think that Tucson may be the place to go, as it has the attractions of a big city, yet is surrounded by mountains. I know many people don't like it, but every time I am there I truly enjoy it even more. It is the perfect size, it is not as bloody hot in the summer as Phoenix, and it has so many more outdoor opportunities. I think I am going to begin putting my resume out and see what turns up.

The other advantage to working in Tucson would be that the kids are going to be about the same demographics as mine are currently. This piece, above all, is important to me. I do not want to end up in a suburban, middle-class white school, it's just not for me. I know that, as much as I know I am meant to be a teacher. It really comes down to the fact of, where can I make the most difference? Where am I needed the most? Whether that be an inner-city district or low-income rural, I don't think it really matters. All of those children deserve a chance to an amazing education, and if I can aid in that process, then I will.

Monday, March 16, 2009

Sedona Secret Canyon Trail

Yesterday, on my second "official" day of Spring Break, Eric and I decided to go hiking in Sedona. We spent the previous evening looking through my books to find the perfect trail. It's frustrating because I'm not to the point yet where I can hike for 9 or 10 miles . . . couple more months, but right now I'm at about 6 miles as my max. This limited some of the hikes, they seemed to be either too easy or too hard. We found, however, what seemed to be the perfect one: Secret Canyon Trail just outside of sedona. 7.6 miles, moderate level difficulty and about 700 feet of elevation gain. . . perfect.



The next morning we headed out at about 8:30 and hit the Corner Bakery on the way (oh so delicious) where I had my first Blueberry Muffin in 3 months!! :-) We finally got on the road about 9:30, and reached Sedona at about 11:30. I forgot how far it is, I was thinking about an 1 1/2 hours, but it took a bit longer. Once we finally reached Red Rocks Territory, Eric's reaction was much the same as mine last year when dad and I went. Simple wonder. There's not much else you can say when you finally reach there. It is absolutely unbelievable. We finally got into town, which took quite a while due to construction, and stopped to figure out exactly where we were going. The trail was West of town on 89A, then right on Dry Creek Road. As we were driving, it seemed very familiar, then we finally reached Dry Creek Road and I realized this was the route dad and I went on last year during our "jeep tour." After driving on Dry Creek Road for a bit, you turn right onto a "maintained road" and must follow that for 3.2 miles. DO NOT DRIVE THIS ROAD IF YOU HAVE A SEDAN! This "maintained road" almost destroyed my little Saturn, a fact of which I was not very happy. We got about 2.5 miles, then decided to walk the rest of the way.

It's odd, whenever I start these trails, I'm so worried that I can't do it that I almost talk myself out of it. I get panicked that I'm not in good enough shape, etc, then eventually I end up completing the trail pretty successfully! I guess this comes from 10 years of being out of shape. I have also found that I do much better if I have an end point in mind. It never fails that the trip back to the car is always easier than the trip out, and I think it's purely physchological. I think for a while, I just have to make sure that I'm giving myself attainable goals, or else I will become completely overwhelmed.

ANYWAY, once we started on the trail, it reminded me so much of home. The smell of the trees, walking in the sandy trail, the scent and sound of running water, I wanted desparately to be up north. The trail was clearly marked with quite a few great little campsites along the way. The beginning follows the path of a river, which you cross twice (if it's flooding, it could be a problem!). Then, slowly we made our descent up for about 2 - 2.5 miles where we reached a plateau with the most beautiful views I think I've ever seen. We stopped here and had PBJ's for lunch (yuck. I need to find a different lunch, I really don't like PBJ), with a bit of trail mix and popcorn. While we sat, I had a great idea to take my bandana off to dry out and lay it over the top of prickly pear. I will NEVER do that again. When I went to put it back on, it had prickles all over it. Shoot. Now I had to walk back with nothing to keep the sweat out of my eyes, at least it was a quick trip back. We probably stayed for 15 - 20 minutes, then headed back. We were going to complete the trail, as it was only another mile, but both of us thought it would be a bit anti-climactic in comparison to where we were.

On the way back, we realized how much we had actually been climbing! The trip back was quick and easy, and only took us about 45 minutes to get back to the trailhead. All in all, it was around a 3 hour hike (including the time to the trailhead from the car, and back). It was incredibly gorgeous and I cannot wait to go back! Perhaps next weekend we'll go up to Prescott which is thankfully, quite a bit closer!